I remember the feeling of hatred. I remember hating things. It’s been a few years now since I’ve felt hatred though and I think it is safe to say I no longer hate. This lack of hatred was no accident though. Here are 13 reasons why I think I no longer hate.
1. I decided I didn’t want to hate anymore. I made the choice not to hate anything or anyone and practiced not hating. This meant deciding to love instead of hate.
2. I stopped using the word hate. I just removed it from my vocabulary. Words are powerful and can have a deep imprint on our own minds.
3. I sold my car. It was easy to hate the world when I was stuck in traffic. Instead, I ride my bike and I’m pretty much always happy when I’m riding whether it’s cruising past traffic or on the open road.
4. I adopted a healthier diet. I feel that eating a healthier diet has improved my mood, balanced me out and helps me to keep my cool.
5. I’m not constantly comparing myself to others, better or worse. This is something I used to do very frequently. Comparing my car, my clothes, my income, my stuff, my achievements. Now I’ve accepted myself for who I am and have no reason to put others down for the sake of bringing myself up.
6. I would like to say it’s because I’ve grown up but I see people far older than me that are full of hate. Instead, I’ll say that I’ve learned to control my emotions and I think this is something that comes with age.
7. I don’t do many competitive things anymore or keep score. I loved playing sports but now I find that instead I ride my bike, go swimming, walk, and do sports that are more casual all for fun rather than competition. I feel no need to win and because of this I sure don’t ever lose either. I used to have to prove myself and winning was a way to do it. But now I’ve got nothing to prove because I believe that we are all equals.
8. I stay away from relationships that don’t serve both parties well. Instead, I nurture positive relationships. This includes lovers, friendship, and family.
9. I realized how small I am. I am just one in seven billion humans and our species is just one in millions. We all matter of course but not enough to shed blood, anger, or hatred to conquer our little spot on this tiny rock flying through space that we call earth.
10. I remember all the wrong that I have done in my own life. How hypocritical it would be for me to hate someone for doing something that I have done in the past? I have stolen, I have lied, I have drank way too much, and I have been reckless. I can not look down on another human for doing this because I have done it myself.
11. I now look for the positive in everyone. I used to be very critical of everyone, often focusing on their flaws rather than their strengths. I now believe that our weaknesses create our strengths and our strengths create our weaknesses. Without one, there would not be the other. Now I embrace people’s flaw, weaknesses, and mistakes, knowing that without them the qualities I love about them may not exist either.
12. I look for the positive side of everything. No matter how bad a situation is, I always look for a positive side of it which gives me no reason to assign blame or hate someone or something.
13. I believe in and follow the words and the peaceful strategies of Martin Luther King and Gandhi. MLK said, “Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” Gandhi said, “You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” So following their advice I have given up hatred and taken up love in order to affect that same change in the world.
Again, I used to feel hate on a fairly common basis. It was just a few days ago that I realized I have not felt any hate in a long time, maybe a few years. Hate drifted out of my life and was replaced by love. I believe it was no accident. I believe that I chose to remove hate from my life and I believe that you can too. It will take courage and it will take strength but a heart full of love and emptied of hate is worth the work both for yourself and everyone in your life.